Thursday, June 24, 2010
25/06/2010 Life quality
Whit my pot, my life qiality increased by 200%. Today, I found out, that I have a beautiful garden, through which I can reach all the strategic points in my life: My friends, the beach, some bars and clubs, Restaurant, the shopping mal and the meeting place. Wow. An other live changing improvement. Great.
Monday, June 21, 2010
21/06/2010 The good things of dead friends
Sarcastic the heading, isn't it? But, go on reading, maybe you will understand it after a while.
As I posted some days ago, my best friend died. So, I was very busy the last days. First with crying, drinking and partying. Who thinks, it is not adequate to go out to the clubs and have fun, while your better half gets eaten by the worms, to them I can just say: Exactly this is the reason for going out! Hanging around at home makes you only depressive, which I already was. But when I go out, I have to behave myself and stop crying. I have an excuse to drink, and I drank a lot.
Second, I was very busy by informing all of our and his friends about his dead. Of course, this is not a topic for a mass email. And of course, everyone want to know some details. So many people are so sad due to this new. And so many people wanted to talk with me. To give me their condolences, to pray with me, to support me, or to get more information. Well, all this was challanging. Very often, when I thought, I am over that crying phase, I received a letter, a picture or a call, and I start to cry again.
Now, I am thankfull for all the wounderful moments he gave me... but still, crying sometimes.
I mean, I know, he is dead, but my heard do not feel it. I am bad in holding contacts. I could say, I am too busy or lazy to write emails, but to be honest, most time, there is nothting new to tell. So my friends are not informed, I do not call, and than, when I need them, I am afraid to call and ask them for a favour, after having not called for such a long time.
The other thing is: I am an expert in avoiding negative topics. In my world, serious negative topics do not exist. So, this is also why I knew my friend was sick (he told me he is serious sick). But why I do not know anything in detail. I did not asked. I changed the topic, telling about health and so. The same now, by chatting with my other friend. We 3 stuck the most time together. And she is the same. Not calling and avoiding topics we do not like to hear.
Due to his dead, she called me. And guess what.. we did not spoke about the fakt, he is dead. We spoke about the nice moments we have had together. And about the organizational things. And about everything else - But his dead.
We were always very close, even if we did not communicate for some month. We were always thinking of each others, and we felt it. We felt each others. And so it is now. My heard did not realize, that my darling died. I feel him still here. I think of him before I sleep, or on some moments in the day. As usual. No difference. I believe, he is dead, but no. No, not for real.
What is strange, is, after I heard from his dead, I remeber other moments than before.
So, the positiv thing is, I have had a reason to contact my friends. And this reason was this time not, because I wanted something from them. Ok, of course the most of them were shocked and sad, but we spoke and we got back in contact, and for 80% I felt, the relationship is the same strong as before. Thank you darling for that! Everyday, I love you more... since almost 10 years. And your death did not stoped it. TC.
As I posted some days ago, my best friend died. So, I was very busy the last days. First with crying, drinking and partying. Who thinks, it is not adequate to go out to the clubs and have fun, while your better half gets eaten by the worms, to them I can just say: Exactly this is the reason for going out! Hanging around at home makes you only depressive, which I already was. But when I go out, I have to behave myself and stop crying. I have an excuse to drink, and I drank a lot.
Second, I was very busy by informing all of our and his friends about his dead. Of course, this is not a topic for a mass email. And of course, everyone want to know some details. So many people are so sad due to this new. And so many people wanted to talk with me. To give me their condolences, to pray with me, to support me, or to get more information. Well, all this was challanging. Very often, when I thought, I am over that crying phase, I received a letter, a picture or a call, and I start to cry again.
Now, I am thankfull for all the wounderful moments he gave me... but still, crying sometimes.
I mean, I know, he is dead, but my heard do not feel it. I am bad in holding contacts. I could say, I am too busy or lazy to write emails, but to be honest, most time, there is nothting new to tell. So my friends are not informed, I do not call, and than, when I need them, I am afraid to call and ask them for a favour, after having not called for such a long time.
The other thing is: I am an expert in avoiding negative topics. In my world, serious negative topics do not exist. So, this is also why I knew my friend was sick (he told me he is serious sick). But why I do not know anything in detail. I did not asked. I changed the topic, telling about health and so. The same now, by chatting with my other friend. We 3 stuck the most time together. And she is the same. Not calling and avoiding topics we do not like to hear.
Due to his dead, she called me. And guess what.. we did not spoke about the fakt, he is dead. We spoke about the nice moments we have had together. And about the organizational things. And about everything else - But his dead.
We were always very close, even if we did not communicate for some month. We were always thinking of each others, and we felt it. We felt each others. And so it is now. My heard did not realize, that my darling died. I feel him still here. I think of him before I sleep, or on some moments in the day. As usual. No difference. I believe, he is dead, but no. No, not for real.
What is strange, is, after I heard from his dead, I remeber other moments than before.
So, the positiv thing is, I have had a reason to contact my friends. And this reason was this time not, because I wanted something from them. Ok, of course the most of them were shocked and sad, but we spoke and we got back in contact, and for 80% I felt, the relationship is the same strong as before. Thank you darling for that! Everyday, I love you more... since almost 10 years. And your death did not stoped it. TC.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
20/06/2010 Yes, there is sun in China
SUN! SUN! SUN! The first sunny day, since I am here. Great warm weather, with a fresh brise, ideal to go to the beach!
Before, I really started thinking, I would be living in a cloud. It was always foggy, if not foggy, than raining. But most time both together. Watching outside my window, I was not sure, why I took a flat with ocean view, if you can not see 5m far. And it was cold. Sooooo cold! I was always with my pullover and long jeans. In the night, I slept with a jumper. But now everything is different! Beach, Sun, Tan, I am coming! For my family and firends: here are some pictures of my flat!
This here is the view from my appartment in the daytime. As you see, today, I can see the sea!
This is my kittchen, Shower, Bathroom and Toilet. All in one. The wok is really rosty, so, I do not cook. Who knows me, know, that I really dislike Chinese food. I hate rice, noodels and glibbery souces. Unfortuntaly, there are rarlly other things available. So, I try to buy from time to time a cucumber, some peppers (Are not always available), tomatos, eggs, fruits and very expansive and cheap quality chees. Buhuhu!!!! I miss my good food culture! To whomever, I come the next time, please give me high quality food! I will never forget you that! I AM ALWAYS SO HUNGRY HERE!
Here you see my one room appartment. My douplex bed and my desk. The window is to my bathroom / kittchen. And there is of course my couch, with some assessoires on it :D
Btw assessoires... In China is everything "cute" and pink or baby blue. All signs are with cartoons. Here my scale and my mat for the shower.
Monday, June 14, 2010
14/06/2010 My darling is dead.
My best friend died a month ago, when I was busy with travelling. I just heard it today. He was not only my best friend since almost 10 years, he was my big, unquestinable love. He knew everything about me, he gave me so many great moments in live, he gave me every single second the feeling beeing loved. And I was always so loving him and always so proud, calling him a friend of mine.
We were travelling together, living together, partying together and speaking about the serious things.
In the last time, I was busy with all the things, and our contact got low. Last month, when we spoke with each others, he told me he is still sick. This was some days before his dead. I knew he was serious sick but I did not asked further, because I did not thought about such a seriousity. He was a strong, healthy young man. Blessed with all talents, a person can have. And he was depressive. Of course, your mood goes down, if you are strong and healthy in general, but actual sick. ... That was my answer. All is easy, all is good, do not worry.
He has had real problems, and I was not listening careful... I was busy with my plans, my thougts, my silly problems and my life. And I regrett it so much.
And I hope I will do this mistake never again. Never. But how to realize this with this global challenge I am faced, and which I am keep on seaking?
Right now, I am feeling so bad. I cannot discribe. I will not discribe.
We were travelling together, living together, partying together and speaking about the serious things.
In the last time, I was busy with all the things, and our contact got low. Last month, when we spoke with each others, he told me he is still sick. This was some days before his dead. I knew he was serious sick but I did not asked further, because I did not thought about such a seriousity. He was a strong, healthy young man. Blessed with all talents, a person can have. And he was depressive. Of course, your mood goes down, if you are strong and healthy in general, but actual sick. ... That was my answer. All is easy, all is good, do not worry.
He has had real problems, and I was not listening careful... I was busy with my plans, my thougts, my silly problems and my life. And I regrett it so much.
And I hope I will do this mistake never again. Never. But how to realize this with this global challenge I am faced, and which I am keep on seaking?
Right now, I am feeling so bad. I cannot discribe. I will not discribe.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
8/6/2010 Chinese Massage
I was at the massage yesterday. Outch. I am not sure, if this is really healthy.
6/6/2010 In China now
I am in China. In Dalian to be precise. All people here speak chinese. And only chinese. And they love sugar. Even the 8$ cheese taste sweet. Hmmm.
I learned some words Chinese, which improved my live quality a bit:
Bu: No / Not; Tang: Sugar
And Nihau: Hi, Tang: Soup.
XieXie: Thank you. But that, they do not understand. Maybe my pronaunciation is just t
o poor.
At least, I can now ask in the supermarket, if they have coffee without sugar and can go home, being informed, that they really do not have them.
But therefore, they have a lot of other things. My new hobby is to go to Tesco and Walmart and to see what they are selling. Everyday, I see new crazy things. And everywhere you can try a lot of new food and services. Like the massage chair. My friend and I, we tested it for 20 minuts. Only the coffee was missing. Sooo relaxing.
I learned some words Chinese, which improved my live quality a bit:
Bu: No / Not; Tang: Sugar
And Nihau: Hi, Tang: Soup.
XieXie: Thank you. But that, they do not understand. Maybe my pronaunciation is just t
o poor.At least, I can now ask in the supermarket, if they have coffee without sugar and can go home, being informed, that they really do not have them.
But therefore, they have a lot of other things. My new hobby is to go to Tesco and Walmart and to see what they are selling. Everyday, I see new crazy things. And everywhere you can try a lot of new food and services. Like the massage chair. My friend and I, we tested it for 20 minuts. Only the coffee was missing. Sooo relaxing.
1/6/2010 Waking up in Singapore
Singapore is an amazing 
place. I love it. Everything is clean, public transportation is good, people are nice dressed, and all is available.
My friend explained it like that: In Singapore, you can live your live as you wish. You can live Indian, Chinese, Malayan, Western or Japanese. And you can decide everyday new.
I live here in a wounderful flat in an amazing appartmenthouse. Everything is here, everything is available. And my friend is with me in the evening and nights.
During the daytime, I am visiting my conference. Wow. It feels so good to wear a suit and the costum. I have not worn my business dresses for too long. Nothing is real fitting anymore, I lost some weight. Everymorning, I stand up and go to the conference. I take an extremly expansive coffee (to honour me, to "work" again). Then, when I am entering the room some of the o
thers are already there, greeting me, we sitting together chatting, laughting, working until late in the night. And of course we go to parties afterwards. And to lunch between. Tasty japanese food.
In all, with 2500 Japanese around me, I feel in Japan. And I feel good. I feel the harmony. I feel home. I love it. I feel my self as part of thw whole. Of a big group, of a organic mass, swapping their way with the music. Sounds weird. but is soo great. Once again: I love those crazy japanese guys. We are so similar. Shy and very formal, but if in party mood, without any borders and limits. Conservative, and individualistic, not always open for new contacts, but always want to belong to the group and want to have those people around us.
place. I love it. Everything is clean, public transportation is good, people are nice dressed, and all is available.My friend explained it like that: In Singapore, you can live your live as you wish. You can live Indian, Chinese, Malayan, Western or Japanese. And you can decide everyday new.
I live here in a wounderful flat in an amazing appartmenthouse. Everything is here, everything is available. And my friend is with me in the evening and nights.
During the daytime, I am visiting my conference. Wow. It feels so good to wear a suit and the costum. I have not worn my business dresses for too long. Nothing is real fitting anymore, I lost some weight. Everymorning, I stand up and go to the conference. I take an extremly expansive coffee (to honour me, to "work" again). Then, when I am entering the room some of the o
thers are already there, greeting me, we sitting together chatting, laughting, working until late in the night. And of course we go to parties afterwards. And to lunch between. Tasty japanese food.In all, with 2500 Japanese around me, I feel in Japan. And I feel good. I feel the harmony. I feel home. I love it. I feel my self as part of thw whole. Of a big group, of a organic mass, swapping their way with the music. Sounds weird. but is soo great. Once again: I love those crazy japanese guys. We are so similar. Shy and very formal, but if in party mood, without any borders and limits. Conservative, and individualistic, not always open for new contacts, but always want to belong to the group and want to have those people around us.
31/05/2010 Shopping tour to Indonesia
8:00 in the morning, I arrived in Singapore.
8:30 I stored my luggage at the central station and drive with the bus to the shopping center.
9:00 I am in a shop to buy a new gift for my friend. Puhh--- everything is so expensive. So, I went to the next shop. Here the same.
10:00 My market analysis is finished. Result: Singapore is too expansive! A bottle Vodka: 85$. A box pralinees 50$. Puhh...
11:00 I buy a ticket with the ferry to Indonesia.
12:00 A new Visa is in my passport.
8:30 I stored my luggage at the central station and drive with the bus to the shopping center.
9:00 I am in a shop to buy a new gift for my friend. Puhh--- everything is so expensive. So, I went to the next shop. Here the same.
10:00 My market analysis is finished. Result: Singapore is too expansive! A bottle Vodka: 85$. A box pralinees 50$. Puhh...
11:00 I buy a ticket with the ferry to Indonesia.
12:00 A new Visa is in my passport.
27/05/2010 from Kuala Lumpur and Cameroon Highlands
I sta
yed almost one week in Malaysia. The most time in Kuala Lumpure and 2 days in the cameroon highlands. In Kuala Lumpure I visited the city, but I was really unmotivated. It was a strange feeling without my friends, suddently alone and have to be independent. Suddently, I was again responsible for myself. I have had to carry my bags by myself, I have to decide alone where to stay, what to do and what to eat. So many decisions made me very tired. And there was noone, with whom I could share my impressions. (hmm.. not 100% true, the first day, I met a cool Australian girl, and we spent 2 days together running around the city, this was fun).
What I really loved on Kuala Lumpur was food stalls. I love basic food, somewhere on the street, cheap and tasty. I wanna see what I eat and not really know
it in detail. I am sure, from time to time, this was good so. And I love the food streets in the night... Always busy, always something to see What me surprised with KL was my desire to spent time in the shopping malls. Normaly I avoid such places and I dislike it. But after such a long time in the jungle and on the islands, I was so happy to see the high end fashion shops. The new collection, the jewels, the designs. I spent 2 days with visiting Cartier, Chopard, Fendi and all the other palces.
An other nice thing was, when I was walking on the street and I heard very strange nois
e. Looking through a window, I saw an old man and an old woman singing chinese karaokee. I guess they were training. I hope so for them. They sung with an imporession, as this singing would be the most serious thing in their life. Very concentrated, very focused, but soooo wrong. I hope they have had fun.
So, I stayed the most time home, doing some work, writing papers, trying to relax. For 2 days I went to cameroon Highlands, a wounderful place. A little bit like my home with all the winery (in Camreoon, there are no wineyards, but tea plantages) but a bit smaller.
In Cameroon Highlands, they have a delicatess: A steamboat. You get a big pot of soud (boiling water with some flavour, a clear soup) and a lot of other things you can add in and boil your own flavour soup. Even, knowing that going to an restaurant, for boiling the own food makes no sence at all, I really wanted to try this steam boat. I love soup very much and to sit somewhere and putting things in a pot the whole night sounds like fun. But unfortunatly, they served the seam boat only for at least 2 persons. So, I was not allowed to order it. Once again, I missed my friends and went hungry to bed.
yed almost one week in Malaysia. The most time in Kuala Lumpure and 2 days in the cameroon highlands. In Kuala Lumpure I visited the city, but I was really unmotivated. It was a strange feeling without my friends, suddently alone and have to be independent. Suddently, I was again responsible for myself. I have had to carry my bags by myself, I have to decide alone where to stay, what to do and what to eat. So many decisions made me very tired. And there was noone, with whom I could share my impressions. (hmm.. not 100% true, the first day, I met a cool Australian girl, and we spent 2 days together running around the city, this was fun).What I really loved on Kuala Lumpur was food stalls. I love basic food, somewhere on the street, cheap and tasty. I wanna see what I eat and not really know
it in detail. I am sure, from time to time, this was good so. And I love the food streets in the night... Always busy, always something to see What me surprised with KL was my desire to spent time in the shopping malls. Normaly I avoid such places and I dislike it. But after such a long time in the jungle and on the islands, I was so happy to see the high end fashion shops. The new collection, the jewels, the designs. I spent 2 days with visiting Cartier, Chopard, Fendi and all the other palces.An other nice thing was, when I was walking on the street and I heard very strange nois
e. Looking through a window, I saw an old man and an old woman singing chinese karaokee. I guess they were training. I hope so for them. They sung with an imporession, as this singing would be the most serious thing in their life. Very concentrated, very focused, but soooo wrong. I hope they have had fun.So, I stayed the most time home, doing some work, writing papers, trying to relax. For 2 days I went to cameroon Highlands, a wounderful place. A little bit like my home with all the winery (in Camreoon, there are no wineyards, but tea plantages) but a bit smaller.
In Cameroon Highlands, they have a delicatess: A steamboat. You get a big pot of soud (boiling water with some flavour, a clear soup) and a lot of other things you can add in and boil your own flavour soup. Even, knowing that going to an restaurant, for boiling the own food makes no sence at all, I really wanted to try this steam boat. I love soup very much and to sit somewhere and putting things in a pot the whole night sounds like fun. But unfortunatly, they served the seam boat only for at least 2 persons. So, I was not allowed to order it. Once again, I missed my friends and went hungry to bed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
